Today, Chuck would have celebrated his 45th birthday.
The candles shine just as bright, warming our hearts just as much.

Much love to you, Lulu.

It’s been a year. Five Minutes of Fame is back. Less tears, more laughing.
If you’re reading this, it’s because you’ve been thinking of Chuck/Lulu. Leave a comment to this post and express your thoughts.

Previously unreleased video:
http://www.queensgonewild.com/main.php/v/FabMemory

McDUFF GILLIS, Charles William “Chuck”

McDUFF GILLIS, Charles William “Chuck” - 43, Halifax, passed away on Thursday, February 8, 2007, in the VG Site, QEII, following a courageous battle with cancer. Born in Fredericton, N.B., on November 12, 1963, Charles was the son of Joseph and Alexina (Jordan) Gillis. Throughout his life, he was a successful make-up artist, who had a natural flare for this passion. Affectionately known as “Chuck”, he will forever be remembered for his love of photography, and as being the entertainer who had a huge heart. He deeply loved his family, and he was special to all who loved him. He will be greatly missed and never forgotten by his husband, William “Billy” McDuff Gillis; his parents, Joseph and Alexina Gillis, Sydney; brother, Joseph (Darlene), Orleans, Ont.; sisters, Mary Trites (Larry), Moncton, N.B.; Kathy Belanger (Alain), Orleans, Ont.; and Jo-Ann Haffey (Wayne), Milton, Ont.; as well as nieces, Patti, Jennifer, and Melanie; nephews, Tony and Gregg, and great-niece, Morgan “Goona”. His memory will be treasured by his special friends, Priscilla, Trudy, Darrin, Kieran, Neon, Trash, and many others, too numerous to mention. By request, cremation has taken place under the care of J. Albert Walker Funeral Home (2005) Ltd., 149 Herring Cove Rd., Spryfield, (477-5601), where a celebration of life in memory of Chuck will be held on Tuesday, February 13, at 2 p.m. in the funeral home chapel, with Rev. Canon David Fletcher presiding. In lieu of flowers, the family would appreciate remembrances to the Canadian Cancer Society or the AIDS Coalition of Nova Scotia. On-line condolences may be sent to: wfh2005@ns.sympatico.ca

—
Lulu Larude & Chuck Gillis
Left this world to join another, more disco-ball populated world than ours, February 8th, 2007.

‘Heaven has a new Queen today.’

Please leave your comments in the previous post’s “Comments” section, for Lulu to check-in and read from an internet-cafe in heaven.

–

There was a reception at 4pm @ Reflections following Chuck/Lulu’s funeral on Tuesday Feb 12th and a benefit show on Sunday, Feb 18th.

Chronicle Herald reports on Lulu’s final farewell

HI everyone. Alot has happened in the last few days that i find is now important to those that surround me, especially amongst my friends and family. I was informed a few days ago that I have approx 2 months to live. My cancer is getting worse even as a result of the many treatments I have worked thru over the last five ailments but have not succeded from any of the attempts tried.

There will be time i feel better between now and times as it unfolds, but it is not going anywhere near healing. Even if i am able to feel 100% better, and performing etc. there will be no change in my cancer status. It will get progressively worst but not not be painful (not a lot anyway). This of course was very disturbing.

The pain felt by those that love me are being taking badly and feeling heart broken, but after a couple of days they are changing there opinion and are starting believing in miracles.I believe in Miracles as well and truly believe that i will magically survive this cancer. I know that my Family and close circle of my closest friends believe in miracles. So with all the support I will have a huge amount of love and compassion as it all unleashes.

Its really not all that trouble creating this miracle, i am just going to ask all those that know me (and  all people that do not,) co workers, show fans, website fans, drag queen wanna be’s…anyone at all, and in unison make a prayer to god (how ever u view him) asking him to cure me of cancer and avoid the cancer in the future. I have seen alot of people in the past cure miracles when clearing and having victory. so on Sunday Febuary 4th at 11 am , I am asking all of my friends from across the country and around the world, all the people i have met thru theater gigs, all the cast i worked with and new in Toronto , all my personal friends i have the belief they are folllowing this challenge closey….everyone!! By all speaking to god at the same time asking us for forgiveness and a future for me, if we do this all at the sametime i belief he will cure me of the cancer and by doing so he change my way of life and not  just physically, but a new way of thinking as well. All of you can help. Just pray, its simple. The only thing important is that the time is based in Halifax so when it happens at 11 o’clock here. it will happen in Ottawa, Toronto etc at 10:00, Toronto would also be 10:00. Alberta would be 8:00, Vancouver 7:00. They all sound different but every person praying at that time is actually awake at the same time, I feel at that time and with that much questioning to God from so many people it wil get his attention and hopefully help us out of this dire situation. Its worth a shot if nothing else. It certainly cant cancel:-)

Billy and I were treated to a visit from my Baby sister Joann (she is a gorgeous 42) and her 19 year old son, my nephew Greg. We spent time here then we all went to Cape Breton to surprise my folks , (which we really did !) My health was good and got to spend spme fantastic time with Mom, Dad, Greg, Joann and Billy. It was great. We were only able to spend short trips out of the house but it was still a great trip and we were able to spend the day sharing amazing conversations.My folks are truly two of the most amzing and interesting people I know.

Joann got too do a little bit of shopping while she was down here. I of course insisted we go to Wal Mart, where we dont have a vehicle so dont get trips often enough. We picked up some great plants…they were so gorgeous and cheap i could not resisit. One of them, my favorite , was a gift from her and Greg. At her next trip to Wal-Mart she picked up a great clock which features personal photos as a gift for Billy and I. I love it and cant wait to deside what pics i want it to post. I am thinking kids photos that are baby pics of my friends and family, We will see what happens.

All in all it was amazing trip even though a little more time would have been great. I should actually be thankful. It was not too long after they left that I was unexpectadlely admitted to the hospital, I was not expecting to be admitted at all but was glad that my sister and her son left before it happened. I put up a stink of course  as usually but it did me no good. I was kept. THey were doing a complete med change at this point. It took no time before it started to be effective. It was also the time my Doctor told us i had approx 2 months to live. Sharing that news with my family and close line of friends was the most powerful thing I have ever had to announcence. It still continues as I am still just informing. That will be over soon as it really moves me and 2 months is not a long period in the least. I do know that in the meantime i am fortunate to find and fill some wonderful times with my friends and one and only true family, my mom and dad and of course my beloved bro and sisters. They have never failed me and are there for me every minute. Just looking at them and seeing all my friends besides my ever so strong gives me amazing belief that everything is going to be a Miracle and i will live alot longer. If all of you read this stay faithful with it and help make is haooen with us. Sounds crazy but have faith ok?

Anyway thats enough for now. I still have plenty to say but will save it for a day or two. It will give me sonething to talk about.

Billy, what can i say but you are simply the most amazing man in the world. Every gay couple out there should be deeply jealous. There is no one like you and never will be. I have never had a better wish to my life. God brought me the amazing meeting of you, and it worked, true success in every way….excpet of course my cancer:( I am hoping God will take the last bad experience and wipe it away and i have true belief it will cure me and God will give us back our lives. I belief he will just witnessing the color always presented as a winner. The same will happen again. I love you Billy!!!! And of course thanks Priscilla  and chaniqua…..dont know what we would do without you.

Anyway VON has arrived and I must go downstairs. I will be back soon, till then much  love and thanks for the Love, dont know what i would do with yu

xo Lulu

A few of you may notice that my last entry implied that we were not going to Cape Breton but that was a fib. We wanted to keep it a secret so they would be really surprised and it worked . The were delighted as were we. I love it when secret surprises actually work . We had told my oldest sis Mary and baby sis Joann, as she was driving. I dont think hiding in the trunk would have worked so it was a must to tell her, Not a prob as she is good at secrets. We also let Mary know as i just happened to be talking to her when the decision was made. Regardless of who knew, we managed to make it here with the surprise intact so that made us happy.

Joann rented a chryslar 300 which is a really nice car. If only I was rich I would so own one of the those. The one she got is candy red and very eyecatching. Lotsa room for me and Billy in the  back, almost felt like we were driving in a limo , very kewl.

Eureka once again did a great job filling in for me. Its amazing how well he does it all as in real life he does not haved a lot of exp hosting shows like that but he rises to the occasion every time. I tried to give him a much needed break but unfortunately Bo had to cancel at the last minute. The weather pretty much grounded her in Windsor. Now , although i havent spoke to her directly yet she has offered up her formidable skills for the show next week. I am not sure if I will be ready to come back on Thursday so if i cant it would be awesome to have her. We will invite her to stay over night , Sparky as well if they like I think it would be great, that way Timmy(Eureka) can have a break and both Bo and Sparky can party a bit  and not worry about drinking or driving home.

The trip down here has been great, I just wish we had more time. Its Billys first trip to CB in 25 years!! thats an awful long time. We wont really be going anywhere before we go, maybe to the flea market but not much more. The Flea market here is either hit or miss but we will give it a shoot i think. Its always good to see whats going down there anyway,quite the lot of characters frequent it so at least they are interesting if nothing else.

The Half Way to Pride show is tonight at The Flec (reflections). I am suppposed to be cohosting but chances of that happened are very slim. With my vision so impaired it makes it very hard to perform. I am not too worried about not being there as Rouge Fatale ( simply the best) has always been booked to co host so I am certain she wil be fantastic. She really is the best all the way around and will do a great job.

Oh well thats enough for now. We will head home this afternoon and relieve Priscilla of her babysitting duty. I am sure she enjoyed her self last night as she shut and locked the door and enjoyed a very rare and quite night by her lonesome. We will have to try to get away more often so she can do that again soon.

anyway enough for now. I will drop you all aline again soon. Take care everyone and we will see you all soon. Thanks Mom and Dad for a great visit. Next time i hope its longer and we get too see each other often. We are going to make an effort to make that happen. Also my love Billy, thanks for coming with me. I would miss you so much if you werent here. I love you baby. Ok enough for now really!! I only have mere hours left to spend with Joann and Greg as well so i will go and take advantage of that.Take care everone and see you soon. Till then wig out everyone

xo lulu

well i didnt make it last night as any 5MoF groupies may have noticed . I was really hoping too as i have really missed the showed but at the last minute it was determined that i really did not have the vision (seeing triple!!!) and or the balance to handle highheels so home i stayed. Thanks Eureka for once again filling in at the last minute. You are always there when i need you and i really appreciate it. As a surprise we were going to have Bo last night just so we dont over work Eureka but unfortunately the weather prevented here from maiking the long drive to and from Windsor. If she is up to it next week and i am still off We will see if she can try again. I really think you would all have a good time with her and it will give Tim(Eureka) a little bit of a break. When you think of it it is amazing that he keeps coming up with new stuff each week. For me its easy as i have everything at my disposle, Eureka pulls it together new pretty much each week. Its a lot of work so I hope you’re all appreciating it i know I am. I just need more video clips so i can place some on the site and maybe a “Just Eureka” gallery as well. God knows i have some great pics and she is deserving of her own gallery for sure. I think I will do that.

My baby sister and her 19 year old son Greg arrived last night. They will be here till tomorrow morning that go off to Cape Breton for the night to see Mom and Dad. I wish we could go but bewteen appts and finances we cant afford to go anywhere extra and besides they will be back Sunday afternoon and we will visit till monday night. Its great that they will see Mom and Dad. She lucked out in the car rental dept. She managed to get a chrysler 300 at a a great price and its pretty posh. They will definately be travelling in style.

I cant believe how tall and old Greg is . I have not see him since he was 17 at his Moms wedding. He is a great looking kid with a really nice down to earth personality. He has a beautiful GF that seems to be heading in the right direction. As long as she makes him happy it makes us happy. The are both smart and know they want to make there education a priority so they are not rushing into anything but are certainly into each other big time so it will be interesting to see where it goes. UPwards we hope:-)

Its great to see Joann, glad to see her happy, not that she isnt the vast majority of time anyway. She is enjoying a short break from work over the last week. It looks like she is enjoying it. She will start a new job pretty quickly so its best that she can use this time to have some fun. The only thing that sucks, and i do it too, is that she will miss Wayne alot (wayne=husband) I hate being away from Billy and know she feels the same way about wayne. Oh well between us here and Mom and Dad in CB we will keep her distracted and before she knows it she will be back home aith her honey

I have actually been feeling really good physically with the exception of my vision. It seems to have gotten worse in the last few days and have had to dig out an eyepatch again. Maybe its time for ” I only have eyes for Lu” eyepatch contest, round II. lol. I hope it fixes itself again soon. I find it very frustrating and being in public terrifies me as i keep running into things and people. The grocery store is particularily bad. I will avoid it for the time being.

Being out of the hospital has really lifted my spirits, which of course helps alot with all the psychological shit that goes down during severe illness. Just being out alone made me feel better. We are definately finding better drug combos that are much more effective , although not completely perfect yet. I do get some long term mild head pain , where i am forced to use the maximum amount allowed of my pain meds. They usually work but at the same time they make me so wierd i dont know if its worth it. Although wide awake, i will drift into these convos in my head and answer them outloud, regardless of where I am or what I am doing. Its very odd. Billy has gotten used to it but i havent. Thats for sure. Its wierd because i know i am rmabling as i do it and am fully aware in my head I am, but i cant stop myself. As you can see. I dont know if the pain or the halluciantions are the better option . Knowing me i will stick with getting rid of the pain and not giving a shit about the rambles. People will jist have to get used to it like we did. Maybe I can tell people i have Turrets syndrome. They may buy it lol Billy and P take really good care of me which is great. Its very convenient that P is driving again. The rides to my appts are greatly appreciated. Her and Shaniqua staying here while Billy and I were in the hosiptal was great. Oh P what would i do without you:-)

I should get a move on, my sister will be back from Tim Hortons any second and I need to touch base with my huney at work. I love you baby and will see you when you get home! 

 I have lotsa time so i will be boring you with all the mundane boring aspects of my shack happy existence. Make sure you leave me messages. You know how much I Love them i will leave messages on the messages !!Trust me, I will be so bored that’ll probabably happen. Anyway till next time everyone, take care and i will chat at you soon :

wig out everone!!! XXXOOO  Lulu

oh my god it has been so long since i have had access to a puter i have been unable to do any kind of update. I have not been well as many of you know and have been holed up at the VG since pretty much boxing day. I am still there, but am on a day pass and at home for a few hours…it feels great to be here:-) I had been unable to eat anything for about ten days over the Holidays and had to be taken to the hospital on boxing day. I made some stupid decisions regarding going to the hospital and kept putting it off till i made a deal with Billy and finally went. I should have addressed the situation earlier but I was determined to make it thru xmas with Billy and my folks. Originally we were going to go Cape Breton with Kym Butler but at the last minute it became an undeniable fact that i would be unable to take any kind of road trip and it would have to be cancelled. My parents and myself were really crushed as we had been looking forward to it for so long and really wanted to see each other. Bily was also deeply dissappointed as it was our first real family affair with my parents.

It did not take long to come to a resolution…mom and dad would come to Hfx and withing a couple of hours they were on there way I couldnt be happier. I know what a huge sacrifice for my Mom to leave home for the holidays, dad as well but nothing would stop them and they were coming. They arrived about 8 hours later and immediately i starting to feel better. It was so great to see them face to face. Although I talk to them on the phone pretty much everyday we dont see each other nearly enough. One of my resolutions this year is to make a drastic change there and see them as often as humanly possible. Besides it will be great to show Billy Cape Breton in the summer in all its glory and there is no one that has driven more of that island than my folks:-) My Dad is the ultimate tour guide.

Anyway back to the hospital….The first time in on Boxing was basically an emergency I was not doing well at all and now that Xmas was over i would concede to Billy and go. An ambulance was called and they were there within moments. The rest of that evening was a blur of activicty and i was eventually checked into a room at the VG. I was getting tons of Ambulance drives that night. Once settled a litany of tests began as they got on with their diagnosis and prognosis.

I was there for about three days and then sent home which I was so grateful for. They were still working on the prognosis but figured my recent chemo i had had that week and the lack of fluids , nutrients etc were definately contributing. My parents stayed long enough to see a turn around in my health before they headed back to CB. there is no way they would have gone if i had not shown improvement like I did. It ended up to be a dramatic end to our Xmas but in retrospect we all got to be togther at this important time of year so I am extremely grateful for that.

I was doing ok for awhile but not great by a long shot. Withn days the appetite thing became a problem again. I was slowly getting weaker and felt like i was starving to death. ON sunday i woke up and told Billywe would have to go to the hospital. Another ambuance was dispatched and i was once again taken to the hospital. Although the attendants were really nice people and knew what they were doing, one of them had attached an oxygen unit that goes right up your nose and puts pure oxygen in your head. Little did they know that the vent that dispurses the air was shooting directly on the tumor. It brought incredibly painful head siezure type things that were unbearable. It did not take anytime ot all to remove the the oxygen mask but by then it was too late and i lived with it for about and hour as maximun amounts of morphine were used to mask it as it subsided.

Once again i was taken back to the VG, where i remain . The first few days were bad as I was very very ill and once again was not consuming any food. I also developed a nasty boil like infection on my shouder which was painful and very unattractive . It is now cleared up for the most part. Thank God…noone likes a festering queen!!! I am butting heads with one of my doctors as she has bad english and does not liten to you when you talk to her. She is good at what she does , I will give her that but i dont ike her appraoch. She basically called me a liar whe we were having a discussion regarding what was said about a pass to leave the hospital. It pissed me off. I got my passes and have not seen much of her sonce yesterday morning so thats good, I can have a cool down period ….Anyway folks thats what has been happening. I must let you kow that the past couple of days have been remarkable in how well i feel. I am not going to let that fool me though and am going to contnue to take it very easy once released. I am determined to keep my newly skinny ass out of that hospital.

On a a completely different subject…thanks so much Eureka for keeping the ol ball rolling at 5MoF. I dont know what i would do with out you. You have been such a great friend and i love you. I will be back soon , maybe even this week but keep your heels handy as you know how these thkings go these days. For those of you that dont know, even though i am not there, Eureka shares the hosting fee with me regardless and his generosity is truly heart warming. Thank you so much my dear friend…You too Brad (farrah) i hear nothing but amazing things regarding how well you are doing….no big surprise really thanks to you too

I was dimayed and heart broken this week when i heard the news of the shooting of Helen Hill and her husband Paul. They were shot in the home in New Orleans leaving Helen dead and Paul with a bullet in his face. They were once may neighbours here in Hfx and were truly amazing people. There approach to community, art and just people in geneeral was always amazing. there was nobody like them. To see the shooting and death of someone like Helen and maiming of Paul really makes me question my faith in God. How could such a horrible incident happen to people like Helen and Paul who were without a doubt a step above most people, there was nobody like them and i doubt there ever will be again. Helen rest in peace and Paul know that you are in my payers for a speey recovery..once again my deepest sympathy.

A couple of freinds are suffering the norwalk virus this week . and i want to wish you a speedy recovery. I wont mention you by name as I consider that sort of thing to be private info but you know who you are…youre also in my prayers…get well real soon

Annie!!! welcome home my sweet. I will see you soon. Glad to have you back where you belong. Youre Mama loves you. Take good care of your sister while she is not feeling well ok .

Last but not least, Iris call the house and get the number for the hospital from Billy. I need you to fill me in on everything and have no time for email.(i have 40 unanswered!!! I promist to get to them this week!!) If he is not here someone will be with the number, I look forward to chatting, I am a little worried about you  so call soon

well thats it finally. Love you all, take care and i will add more later this week, until then take care

xxxoooLulu

PS now the next day so had to do a quick edit…I am free!!! i was released about an hour ago and feel FANTASTIC!!! Bily my love I am so happy to be coming home, Although you spent all those nights on a cot curled up next to me it sure is not the same thing as having you truly by my side, i love you so much , and P!!  my princess in shining lipgloss! What in the world would i ever do without you. Extra special thanks this week for you and Shaniqua taking care of the kids. We had not a concern in the world regarding them and to be with out even one extra worry is so great.you did a great job and we both apprecaite and love you guys immensely

Anyway that really is it for now…Darren your letter is on the way, so sorry i could not get to it sooner, it may not be oif any use to you as i know the deadline is now past but i am writing it regardless as there are many many wonderful things i would like to share with you in reminisense. Look for it in the next 24 hours …love ya!

Hey there everyone, Happy New Year!! My apologies once again regarding the tardiness of this update. A few things are holding it back including some bizarre wrist ache that only comes up when i type ( of course )i am going to attempt it one handed so bear with any mistakes you may come across.

The rest of Christmas was low key and peaceful here at the old homestead. billy and i opted to keep a low profile. it marked the first anniversary of when i laid eyes on him at Reflections ( Jan 1, 12:55 am 2006 and although we really wanted to do something to commemorate it we decided a short postponment would most definately be to our advantage. Besides that my over all health, although tolerable was not the best so we did not want to make any plans that would have to be nixed at the last minute. We had already done enough of that. REgardless of the circumstance, i loved sitting quietly and stealing glmaces at Billy as the evening progresed. Asking my self how in the world did I ever luck out so much as to find the man of my dreams. my soul mate. my hero. Everytime i looked at him I would get a sense that everything was going to be OK and believed it and still do. i thank god for him on so many levels.Anyway.. enough of that, boy am I gettng smoooshy…Billy I love you baby. let me leave it at that for now before i embarass myself lol

The show last week was very fun although once again the scrounge for contestants was tuff and we did not start till really late (big surprise!!) I dont know why that is..200 clams at this time of year, boy thats gotta come in handy or obviously they just got too much money on their hands…wuldnt that be nice. Regardless, the boys once again nailed us three, and all three were excellent. I was enjoying a very good night health wise , no headaches etc at all but I still kept it moving on at a good pace. I wanted yo be sure i did not overdue it in anyway and thank god i didnt as it made for a fun time . Semi, Sarah (girl singer) and April Showers made up the three contestants and each one brought there own unique thing. Semi started off with a very steppy dance tune. I had seen him do it once before and loved it just as much this time around. Its a great choice for showing off his natural energy. The judges, which were made up of young folks that had all been judges many times, gave semi mixed reviews with marks from the low to high fives . Sarah sang next and imust say i LOV ED her voice. She reminded me of Dilani on Rockstar. During her number a  young guy whose identity remains unknown got up an did air guitar during her musical break, i am not sure it was planned or not but it was fun. The judges liked her alot and gave her great marks. April was next and did a number i cannot recall the name too but it was very upbeat and festive. She wore next to nothing, and i mean next to nothing, two strings and a couple of bottle caps lol That laways amazes the crowd as they are looking real close wondering “where is is ? ” lol. Of course being only three they all advanced to round two.

We nearly lost Sarah in the second set as she didnt have anythng prepared. She was one of the contestants that did it as a favor to fill the roster. Timmy and her figured it out and she did an accapella number in set two.Once again she recioeved great marks although not quite as good as round one. Semi sang once again and once again recieved a mixed bag for marks. I think there was a little bias on the judges part as they are all regfulars  and do see Semi quite a bit and i believe they expect alot. April wrapped it up with a little Gwen Stefani that ripped the roof of the place. The crowd and and the judges loved her and her styrophome wig was a huge hit. It was apparent she would win and it was well deserved.

The crowd was huge which is always great. And thank god not too drunk. When it gets really busy and people have had alot to drink they can heckle and get obnoxious but not on that night, everyone was well behaved for the most part. I had to once again leave as soon as i was done. Its not that i was not feeling well because i actually felt pretty good, but i was tired and having trouble hearing what people were saying when i was trying to talk to them in the bar. I hate that , between my hearing impairment and the din in the bar it was very diffidult to understand what was being said, its so annoyin. I could hear fine in the dressing room but that was really it so we took off right away. Billy had a great time and i was so glad to see it. the poor guy never gets out these days so it was  great to see him kick back and relax. Him getting to come out on a thursday night (work the next day ) is a rare treat so I am so glad he had fun.

I got to do a fun job for April this week and it was a riot. She wanted us to make a fake vagina so when she disrobed she would look completely naked. I had never made anything like it before. As a matter of fact i have only actually seen one vagina in my life and i was around 12 at the time. I have seen a few pics thank god lol. It turned out great and although i did not get too see her actually strip tease during the show ojn New Years Eve, i hear it blew everyone away!! I love it when things like that turn out lol. I am sure i will get a pic from her to post sometime soon. If it looks as good on as it did off all you gay boys may be a bit shocked …just remember its only rubber!!! lol

Anyway enough for now, I will add the pics in the next little while. I need to give my wrist a break, its starting to ache. Love and miss you all and hope to see you all soon. I will be at work on Thursday night, not sure how busy it will be with eveyone winding down from new years but I am sure we will have a great time….now if only i can get 6 or 7 contestants wouldnt that be nice Please dont forget to leave me a message as you know how i love them and i will be back quicker ith the next update, i promise. Billy. I love you more and more with each passing moment. I cant wait for us to celebrate fully very soon. And last but not least much love to my family who check out my blog, Especially Mom and Dad. I know how strange all of this originally seeemed to you but you have really grown to understand it all and thats a beautiful feeling. I am so glad i can share this apsect of my life with you all. I love you and am so grateful to have you as my family. Thanks for everything always, I love you

ok thats really it for now, bless you all and keep me in your prayers. We are not there yet as far as healing goes and all of your thoughts and prayers will come in very handy. Until next time, wig out everyone and see you THursday

xo lulu

I 100% believe in miracles!! I never in a million years would have believed yesterday that  would feel like i do today…Hooray! The problem was as i suspected. I had not eaten any solids in about ten days and was consuming  hardly and liquid of any sort over that period  of time as well. Anything that I consumed came right back within minutes. This was really fucking me up because that included all of my meds, so everytime i took the pills and tried to wash them down i would throw them up immediatley and lose their effecacy as they could no be taken again until the next dose ws due. Needless to say it was making all aspects of my mind and body, causing severe pain and confusion. Yesterday i finally agreed to go the hospital as i knew i needed to be hydrated despertaly as soon as possible and I was sure they could take care of it there, i was just not sure how many hours i would need to wait. Well surprise surprise, we called an ambulance at 10am and by 10:30 i wa already admited to the ER and shipped to Xray for a MRI which ony took about 15 minutes. In the meantime the doctors and nurse had got me started on the IV and i although far from cured I could slowly feel the IV and pills taking control and for the first time in two weeks i was not nauseas. My parents and bIlly stayed with me at the hospital while I slept while getting pumped up and The Doctors were able to do there thing., At about 4 they came in and explained what was going on. they provided me with a few options all of which recommended staying in the hospital. From what he said i should have a pretty quick response to the mixture of new drugs and would be able to go home soon. I asked him since i would not be doing much except sleeping and taking pills couldnt i do it at home expecially since i only lived a couple of blocks away. After a brief discussion I was allowed toleave with ther blessing as long as i promise to incorporate the neww drugs over night and today and see how it goes. From the momemt I arrived at home i felt better, very minor headache and a bit of an appetite. While at the Hospital my nurse recomended i try Carnation Instant Breakfast. She had gone thru 7 rounds of chemo and five rounds of radiation to treat her cancer just two years ago. Boy was she right. Billy went to get me a couple of diffrent flavors to try and see if i liked them, I started to feel an improvement immediately. With a couple of hours i felt completely settled in the stomach and couldnt beleive how good it felt., it had been so long. Taking my meds was not a problem in the least and everything stayed put. The next three times i had to take pills i had the same success and am hoping and Praying that that will stay the same. Looking and feeling good so far I slept great last night although the chatting in my sleep has become interesting according to Billy lol In the morning and so far today i have felt amazing both physically and emotionally. The Hour i spent alone last night praying for a miracle paid off for when i woke up this morning i felt the best i have felt in months and months. Too me it truely is a Miracle. I know many of my friends and family are praying for me on an everday basis so please dont stop, It has alot of value and i appreacite it like you would nt believe..thank you thank you, thank you!!!

I am still benig smart and really takng it easy, and will for quiet a while. I will see how i feel tomorrow and if its half as good as today you will see me at the show Thursday night, and not just muddling thru, I mean actually enteraining everyone lol instead of just stumbling thru the motions , which i have been guilty of more than once in the last while.I promise you I will give it my all and actully enjoy it in the process!

Anyway enough for now. I will be adding pics of my xmas gifts etc in the next day or two and will take lotsa pics on thursday. I think it wil be busy as alott of people are still of utnil after new years and many others visiting from away so I am thinking it will be fun, hope to see you there

 Billy , love of my life , extra big thanks to you my love for the strength and love you show for me everyday. I love you.

well folks till next time “wig out” and take care

xo lulu

wow its been two weeks since i have left an update here and i apologize profusely. The simple truth of the matter is is that I have not been well at all and sittiing down and writing takes some real energy that i dont seem to have. Tomorrow morning i am going back to the hospital where i may be kept for awhile. i will fill everyone in when i am able to sit here longer.

I just could not let this day pass by without saying a few things. First off, thank you to everyone that has been so suportive over the last while. Boy it can be tuff i will tell you but having  wonderful supportive people in your life that display so much ls such a belssing you have no idea. What would I do without you Priscilla..the transition to the Jay Wells Salon is such good news for both of us and I cant wait to be well enough to add my share of the work. In the mean time thanks so much for you patience and understanding during this time. It will get better i promise thanks Jay for everything and i mean everything. Alot of people are unaware of just how much you have been there for me. how i would have made it thru the first month and a half i was out of the Hospital I do not know. Jay paid nearly all my Bills out of his own pocket and ensured Making Faces would still become part of the Jay Wells family. P is so happy and i cant wait to be well enough to contribute more. Soon i promise:-)

Timmy aka Eureka:-) you are always there for me even if its at the last minute. this past week him and P hosted the show in my absence with just a couple of hours notice. I was as sick as a dog but insisted on working as i could not afford not too. P insisted i dont, contacted Timmy and those guys hosted the show and then paid me the money. I was deeply moved by that gesture as i dont know what i would have done without the cash. Being christmas and all i was in need of every cent possible. Thank you guys so much. you have no idea how much that meant to me Brad and Brandt as well, you guys really show everyone how far friendship takes you. For that i am so grateful.

Thanks as well to Kym Butler. She had rented a vehical to take us all to CB and when it turned out with very short notice that we would be unable to go she refused to let us pay her our share of the cost, about 125 bucks. I will always remember that Kym and hope one day soon BIlly and i can return the favor. Not being able to go was a very bitter pill to swallow but between Kyms generousity and the fact my Parents, with in three hours, packed up there entire christmas including  dinner and came immediately to Hfx really helped improve the situation. That and the fact that my folks spoiled me rotten really made it extra special. My parenst are simply the best and for that I thank god everyday>

Billy has been the most amazing of all. His approach thru all of this has been unbelievable. When i have an extra hour or so i will tell you all the wnderful things he got me for christams which include an iPod video. he is so amazing  and strong. I cant wait for us to begin to enjoy a normal lifetsyle and all this brain cancer bullshit is behind us.He will come with me tomorrow to the hospital. I have not eaten any solid food in about ten days. He has been so patient but i finally broke down and made a deal with him. I wantd to wait until boxing day and promise i would go after that. I am holding up my end of the bargain now and hopefully we will be feeling better soon

anyway i have to run, sorry this is not longer or more detailed but i will add more as soon as it is possible. All the best in the new year (Billy and I ’s one year anniversary is the 1st of Jan i am glad i got the chance to write, at least these few words, to thank you guys. i will try to be quicker with the updates and not keep you waiting 2 weeks. Keep you fingers crossed for me OK

Love you all (especially you Billy Ray

xo lulu